Bernie, A E Ryecart

This is the first book I've read by this author and, sadly, I came in at the very end of the series.  Don't worry, I've added the previous three to my wish list so I'll someday get to enjoy the rest of the Barista Boys.  Bernie is somewhat of a shepherd for all the boys and anyone that needs aid in their little corner of Soho.  The cafe is set up to be a sanctuary of sorts to those people who are homosexual and have no support or resources.  Saving people is what he does.  Since he gives succor to everyone  else we're left to wonder if that's enough.  Not enough for others, but enough for him?  Who comforts him?  Who makes a home for him?  Who eases his burdens?

Opening with a wedding we see just how much Bernie longs for someone to have for his own.  Those desires will just have to wait because on his own stoop is yet another person who needs him.  Fate has a way of combining what we need and what we have to give, though, and not always in a way you'd expect.

The man on his stoop is Jared and is far more damaged than he lets show.  Their first couple meetings aren't ideal at all but hesitation is pushed off in the name of moving forward and healing.  Jared gives in to his yearning and agrees to see Bernie.  More thrilled than he can say, Bernie pursues Jared and is drawn to him in a way he hasn't been for decades.  Both of these men are scared but not willing to let their connection fade away.

There's more than enough darkness in each of them.  Life definitely had their moments of spectacular suck-tasticness.  Watching them navigate courtship and falling in love both in spite of and despite their pasts was heartbreakingly dear.  I have to say that I loved Bernie slightly more than Jared.  Not that Jared wasn't great or deserving of reader admiration, there was just something about Bernie.  The choices he made in life, his devotion to caring for others because of his perceived failure, his commitment to Jared, his fear of being worthy of love for himself, his determination...all of it painted a picture of a man so deserving a partner.

The story was deep, sweet, tender, challenging, and really very good.  Both men found love and healing in one another.  Reading Bernie's story and seeing the happiness he facilitated for all the men around him made me want to read all of the Barista Boys stories.  Excellent book.